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Alkulukuja Paskova Karhu: The Prime Number Shitting Bear

PRIMESTATS
Prime now: 2828857
Prime count: 205326
Prime density: 7.3%
Uptime: 65:55

That’s a lot of primes!

Michael Learns to Suck Donkey Balls

If there is one thing that will finally drive me out of china it is the fucking Danes. Seriously, i mean copenhagen is on an island or something, and they got this word “hygge” which just means “cozy” but they pretend like it is something deep and philisophical which only someone from their tired little archepeligeo or peninsula or whatever the hell their damn country is can understand.

You might think that these nordic fucks would leave me alone all the way over here in china, but no, they have to inflict on me the insipid sounds of “Micheal learns to rock” and their number one hit “take me to your heart.” (warning, clicking on that link will take you to a website that will play the song) it is the oral equivelent of a durian’s smell, sickly sweet with sulphur overtones, the more you are around it the greater the urge to vomit becomes but for some reason those brought up in east asia find it pleasent.

Here’s the chuorus:
“Take me to your heart take me to your soul
Give me your hand before I’m old
Show me what love is - haven’t got a clue
Show me that wonders can be true”

Read it over 5 times and tell me you don’t want to retch up your kidney. Fuck I have to take a pause writing this post, hearing the song play in my head actually gives me an adrenaline ruch of revulsion
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And their name is “Michael learns to rock!” What gave these pussy ass pop fuckes the right to claim they rock?

If these blasphemers of all that is holy in music would have stayed in their cold little country I wouldn’t have given a shit, but they are huge in china. How huge? According to their biography they were “chosen as headliner for the Celebrate Hong Kong Concert on 6 July 1997, the climax to festivities marking the transfer of Hong Kong to China.” So they were the fucking orgasm to the most important political event in china over the last 10 years.

hardly a day goes by in the last couple of weeks were a chinese friend or new aquantence hasn’t asked me, “do you know take me to your heart?” “Can you translate this song?” blah blah blah, plus the fact that it is routinely blarred out of public radios. Normal chinese pop music is enough to make me want to kill myself, but listening to this danish trash makes me want to take out a bus of school children with me. If this dosn’t fall out of favour with the chinese pop culture soon, i seriously might have to consider leaving the country.

(If you thought I was a little to harsh on the danes and nordic people in general, look what aural atrocity the swedes have already let loose on china: Big Big World, I say we have a protest in front of their embassy and go around smashing saabs!)