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I was thinking about changing my no spelling policy, but then I realised that was just the evil pussy side of my brain talking and that I have to stay true to my punk rock life style, so fuck that spelling shite.
Speaking of keeping it real, the other weak I was just thinking that the onion is weak now compared to the onion I knew in my youth. When I was but a wee 14 year old on the cold streets of milwaukee, each week I was delighted to find a new copy the onion near the door of our local subshop. Besides all the “massage parlor” and “escort service” adds in the back, the Onion had hardcore content back then. Every week they published, “the drunk of the week” with a picture of a very drunk person, and some entertaining facts on them. They also pulled no punches with their stories, I remember one that had a title of “New Georgia O’Keeffe painting found” under an unedited picture of a pussy. At my tender age it took me a couple of minutes to figure out what was going on, but when I did I was blown away by the combination of the snobbishly obscure O’keefe reference and the ubsurdity of publishing a “wide open beaver” in a newspaper that was availble on virtually every corner.
So I was glad to see that the Onion was back on it’s game
for those of you to pussy to click the link
“In the end, Leslie said, only one scenario proved both orgasm-inducing and feasible to record: the direct ejaculation of the male member onto a corresponding female partner’s face, with the woman’s head positioned only inches away.
“For some reason,” Leslie said, “no other set of circumstances produced the desired effect. Oh, and the woman has to have high-heeled shoes on, too, even though she’s otherwise undressed. We don’t know why that is, either.”
The scientists acknowledged that such riddles may never be fully solved.
“The male orgasm, like the song of the nightingale or the simple beauty of a rainbow, remains a glorious and beautiful mystery, one whose timeless wonderment cannot be fully explained by something so cold and clinical as scientific analysis,” Roehnert said. “There are many factors at work here that science will likely never understand.”"